Critic's Review
Mash'd is now open for lunch during the week; an excuse to take a trip up to Davie.
The outside space is a strange configuration; designed for friends groups; It didn't appeal to me.
Plenty of parking in the big center; much more at night. The hostess tried to seat me in the middle of the room, and then in the bar area; both of which I vetoed. There were 2 booths in the back; 1 with a backpack in it and another that needed to be cleared. I waited for them to clear the booth.
The lighting in here is terrible; harsh sunlight throughout the corner room.
Same deal towards the bar.
The menu here is bizarre, and frankly it's a bit hard to read. It's on brown paper; 4 pages of stuff, but only 1 page of menu.
My server didn't volunteer the "fish of the day", so I didn't ask. Meanwhile he brought my an iced tea with a lot of lemon.
I switched sides of the table because the glare was bothering me. The back of the room has 1 big TV and the ubiquitous community seating that Millenials demand.
I had trouble finding something I wanted to order. I asked the server about the meatball pizza, but it sounded weird and wrong. I settled on the standard pepperoni pizza; the "6 Cylinder" is the small one; I figured it was 6 squares and the "10 Cylinder" was 10; 6 would be enough.
Music was predictable garbage, with DNCE, Maddie & Tae and Marshmellow feat polluting the airwaves. The Pizza came out in 8 minutes.
When he put it in front of me, I quipped "Oh, it's only 4 cylinders". The size doesn't really come across in the picture, but this is about the size of 1 slice of Sicilian pizza; maybe a slice and a half. Cut into 4 little squares. For $13.
It was a pretty good slice; the pepperoni is cut into cubes instead of slices because everything here has to be done differently. I'm not sure it's any different; it still tastes like pepperoni.
The backpack remained in the booth next to me; no person ever sat at the table. Great idea allocating one of the 4 good tables in the restaurant to nobody so actual customers can't sit there.
I went to the men's room and asked for my check (my server was hovering by the table); paid the $19.57 with tip and out the door; never to return.
Conclusion
This place is designed for Millenials and Millenials only; who else would pay $20 for a slice of pizza and an iced tea? This is really just a bar; the menu is just food to eat with the booze. A place designed to make money, and to only make money.
During the day this place lacks ambiance with the harsh light at every angle; it's probably better at night.
Pre-Opening Musings
Celebrity Chef Ralph Pagano planned to open a naked taco in this location, but his kitchen accident derailed his plans to grow the "naked" brand.
Mash'd is a Texas based venue with weird food that reminds me a bit of Brick House Tap and Tavern. Their web site features some of the worst looking food I've ever seen.
It appears that the gimmick here is that they've taken standard recipes and ruined them with additional ingredients in an effort to be edgy. Hummus with white beans, corn in their spinach dip, pineapple in the Guacamole, chorizo in the meatballs, lots of Sriracha ; but the big gimmick is "Akaushi Beef", whatever that is.
Another place to get a $14 Salad or Cheeseburger opens near Fort Lauderdale.